Total Drama Don't Be Such a Baby Part 3
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Chef: just shut your dang pie-pigsty! First you gotta answer one fan question from… uh… (Looks at flashcard) Scarlett.
(Chef steps aside, and a sophisticated daughter wearing a yellowish sweater, dark-green skirt, glasses, and long scarlet hair tied into a bun approaches)
Scarlett: (Adjusts glasses) greetings, carbon-based life forms commonly referred to as "Full Drama bandage." My parents named me Scarlett, a name derived from an English language surname with an occupational meaning, referring to a person who sells material.
Duncan: (Groans) great! Some other brainiac! Don't we already have enough of those in this church?
Harold: (Smirking) the brains shall inherit the earth. (Snickers. Duncan raises his fist, making Harold zip his lips)
Scarlett: Courtney, I must admit that I admire your decision and your striving for the coveted prize.
Courtney: (Smile proudly) cheers! It's almost time SOMEONE appreciated the proper use of ambition!
Brick: (Glaring) the ambition isn't the trouble, Ma'am. The problem is what you DO with it. And from where I stand, you've handled it in a lousy way!
Courtney: (Glares back) close information technology, maggot!
Jo: hey, Boredney, but I telephone call Soggy McGee "maggot!"
Scarlett: (Clears throat loudly) every bit your acquaintances have demonstrated, I am concerned virtually yours and various others' troubled behavior.
Courtney: (Offended) MY troubled behavior?! Puh-leeze! I'm just reacting to others' diverse IRRITATING actions!
Scarlett: regardless, I'd very much capeesh your input nigh the rumor that Total Drama is responsible for the troubled behavior of today's youth.
Courtney: (Looks over to Duncan, Heather, Jo, and a few of the other villains) …no comment.
Scarlett: (Scowls) really? Considering I firmly believe that the deplorable beliefs of this and so-called "quality program" volition dangerously bear upon the behavioral patterns of this nation's youth.
Duncan: …pssh! No duh, sister. That'south what reality TV does! It'due south chosen Total DRAMA, not Total Psychology Class! You inquire me, you lot oughta bring together Miss CIT over here in pulling those poles out of your butts!
(Scarlett growls quietly)
Courtney: (Notices Scarlett'southward anger) infuriating, isn't he?
Scarlett: (Breathes bitterly) keep it together, Scarlett. Patience is a virtue even against an ignoramus similar him.
Duncan: that's correct! Say my name, sister! (Scarlett growls louder and storms back to her seat)
Anne Maria: yeesh, someone'due south got anger issues.
Dawn: indeed… her aureola seems horribly off-kilter. Equally in a night cloud of irritation is threatening to push her over the edge into a horrible catastrophic end.
Noah: wow… put her on Total Drama and she'll practically be AT the edge.
Chef: (Snickers evilly. Everyone looks at him suspiciously) uh… I was laughing at this joke I heard about some dude from… Nantucket and… uh… j-only call out the next guys!
Courtney: (Unstrapped from the chair) finally. (Groans and strolls to border of the left bleachers) this is only gonna get worse from here, isn't information technology?
Bridgette: well with Chris out of information technology, maybe information technology'll get better from here.
Geoff: there'south but one way to find out, Span-infant! And since it'due south Owen and Scott, what amend way to look back over the flavor than with one last flavor-long edition of… That's Gonna Leave a Mark!!
(The audience applauses, the music starts playing, and the monitor turns on again. It starts showing clips of Owen and Scott taking various spills. Start information technology shows Owen taking the pole to the kiwis during the digging claiming, then Scott and Mal getting stomped on past the monster during the race challenge, then Owen beingness revealed in his bear disguise during the egg challenge, and so Scott getting attacked by different animals from various episodes, then finally a never before seen prune: Owen and Scott are at the top of the snow-covered diving prune fighting over the ice foam snowman's head. Finally ane of them slips and they beginning tumbling towards the edge of the cliff. But they finish in time… until the whole cliff edge gives way sending them both down below. The monitor then cuts to Owen and Scott one-half-frozen; Scott is shivering like crazy, and Owen'south happily licking the ice cream caput. Anybody is great upwards every bit the montage ends)
Geoff: (Wipes his eyes) oh man, it never gets quondam!
Bridgette: (Snickers) and though neither one fabricated it to the final 3, they nevertheless won in their own way: Owen won back the middle of Izzy, and Fang didn't maul Scott again.
Geoff: our adjacent guests both had their jaws busted, really enjoy Chef's cooking, and survived getting the fudge pounded out of them all season…
Bridgette/Geoff: Owen and Scott!!!
(The audience and the cast applaud as Owen and Scott enter. Owen waves at everyone while Scott looks more recluse; for a brief moment, Scott and Courtney awkwardly grab each other'due south eyes and look away)
Owen: hullo, everybody!! (Chuckles) it is Crawly to be here once more!!
Izzy: (Cheers) YAY, OWEN!!! (Whoops like a domestic dog)
Trent: sweet!
Brick: (Salutes) expert to come across you again, soldier!
Scott: (Clears throat loudly) I'm here too, you know!
Cameron: (Feebly and frightened) um… woo, yeah. Become Scott. (Hastily clings to Noah in fear, Noah gives a deadpan expression)
Scott: eh, you're just lucky I ain't in a mood to snap you lot in one-half, pee-wee. (Glares at Courtney) let'southward get this over with! I've got A LOT to talk about!
Owen: well then, don't let me keep y'all waiting. Good luck, buddy. (Walks over to the bleachers, prepares to sit between Noah and Brick)
Chef: a-HEM! And where do you remember you're going, Fat Boy?
Owen: I idea I'd laissez passer, you know, 'cause I already got interviewed in Flavour 2.
Chris: oh no you lot don't! Since Chris' still out of it, I'm in charge of ya'll! And I say, you gotta answer a question from one pair in our audience.
Owen: (Dislocated) uh, don't you mean one PERSON?
Chef: no, I mean one PAIR! (Points off-screen) Meaning those ii.
(Pan over to where Chef was pointing, revealing a pair of blonde female person twins in matching red cheerleader outfits. The just differences betwixt the two are their facial expressions [One looks weak and timid while the other looks common cold and vicious] and a mole on the hateful-looking twin'due south face)
Mean Twin: (Glaring at the good twin) finally! Sorry we're late; nosotros would've been hither sooner if SAMEY hither wasn't driving slower than her brain!
Samey: (Timidly) only I was just driving the speed limit, Amy.
Amy: the speed limit for what, snails in peanut butter?!
Owen: (Shocked) smashing surf and turf! You lot're… yous're twice!! (Rubs optics, then screams) now you're all blurry!!
(Samey giggles while Amy looks disgusted)
Amy: that's considering yous rubbed your eyes, moron!
Owen: (shakes his head) oh no wait… yes, yeah I think I'm adept. (Chuckles) So what's up?
Samey: well, I just wanted to know…
Amy: um, loud interrupting cough! Who said YOU become starting time? Age AND beauty earlier… whatever YOU are, Samey!! (Samey sighs sadly)
Owen: (Confused) "Samey?" Is that a real proper noun?
Samey: w-well my real name is Sammy, only…
Amy: but EVERYONE calls her Samey, (Sneers at Samey) 'cause she'due south the second Amy… the LESSER Amy!
Heather: (Amazed) wow… (Smirks impressively) there is so much we can teach each other.
(Cut to backstage on the girls' side. Gwen is scowling at Amy on the monitor)
Zoey: uh… is it wrong to not like Amy even though I've never met her?
Gwen: if hating someone before yous meet her is wrong, I don't wanna be right. It'due south how I met Heather.
(Cut back onstage)
Amy: alright, so I wanna know; how the heck tin yous be so happy after being a loser… again?! I mean, no million, no bragging rights, AND y'all're however so fat and gross! Only similar Samey! (Samey looks downwards looking even sadder)
LeShawna: (Stands upward, glaring at Amy) yeah? Well better watch what you say, girl! Because if she'southward fat and ugly, then DANG, girl, you got a few minutes of extra ugly up in here! (Everyone else laughs while Samey smiles and Amy pouts)
Owen: anyways, what you call fatty and gross, (Rubs tummy) I telephone call cuddly and insulated. (Chuckles, causing Samey to chuckle too) Anyways, I'm happy considering I had an Awesome fourth dimension!! Whoo! I got to hang out with my old buddies, like Noah and Duncan (Noah and Duncan smile at this), and I made some awesome NEW buddies on the isle! (The mentioned contestants [even those still backstage] smiling every bit he mentions their name) Like Brick, Dawn, Zoey, Mike, even Scott was pretty cool on the last few days! Not to mention my almighty colon hath slain the neat monster… robot brute thing! AAAAAND, Mal didn't put my abdomen in stitches! (Winces nervously; calls backstage) no offense, buddy!
Mike: (Calling from backstage) none taken… again!
Izzy: Olé! (Leaps onto Owen'due south shoulder and sits there)
Owen: (Chuckles) AND, best of all, I got back together with my WILD lady again! (Izzy hugs his head)
Samey: (Touched) awwww!
Amy: (Grossed out) eww, Gag-city, population: you two!! I'm going back to my seat! Don't take also long, Samey! (Marches dorsum to her seat)
LeShawna: (Huffs) yeah good riddance, ya skinny fiddling Heather Junior! (Smiles at Samey) go ahead, girl, you enquire your question.
Samey: Cheers. (Clears throat awkwardly) Kickoff off, it'south really nifty to finally run across you, Owen. (Owen smiles at this) second, um, lamentable if this sounds a piffling nosey, but I noticed in i episode this season that you said Noah was your best friend Always. (Owen looks a piddling nervous)
Noah: hey yeah, I noticed that besides. Not that I'm not flattered or anything, only what'd you hateful past that?
Samey: don't yous have whatever friends back home?
(Owen shifts his eyes nervously towards Samey, then Noah, then Dawn, and finally Izzy, all look very concerned)
Owen: (Sighs) yyyeah, about that. See… dorsum abode, I don't actually have a lot of friends…. Or really any at all. (Anybody in the church gasps in shock. A dramatic music sting is heard) hey, where's that coming from? (Beardo covers his mouth and looks shiftily away)
Bridgette: …Owen? Are you serious? You don't have whatever friends back home? (Owen shakes his head)
Lindsay: (Gasps) ok, I may not exist all that smart…
Courtney: (Muttering to herself) not even gonna get in that location.
Lindsay: but even I think that doesn't make sense!
Beth: I know! Owen'south one of the nicest guys e'er!
Duncan: the dude practically FARTS niceness!! Just wish that was the ONLY thing he farted.
Owen: well… turns out not everyone likes the fatty one who smells like a wet dog soaked in saltwater in Atlantic Urban center… their words, non mine. I even tried beingness a bad boy once; recall when I talked well-nigh all that bad stuff in Season 2?
Geoff: (Chuckles weakly) yeah, that was awesome.
Owen: …yeah, that didn't become well either. Later a while, everyone simply started calling me useless, 'cause I even sucked at being bad.
Geoff: well yeah, man. You're a straight-up guy and people on this testify like that near you.
Owen: (Perks up a flake) that's why I always look forward to coming back on Total Drama; even though the challenges are 18 types of… ouchie, I e'er look forward to hanging out with cool people who really wanna be around me and like me. (Most of the others smiling sadly at this; Alejandro, Heather, Courtney, and Jo await away awkwardly. Izzy affectionately pats Owen on the head)
Noah: well dude, if you ask me information technology'southward their loss, and your gain. This is NOT just me existence contemptuous, the pop world is most as glamorous as eating leftover lobster… which you do anyway; but still information technology's non that corking.
Duncan: yes, better off in the freak center with the rest of united states.
Dawn: and those who do non capeesh you or your "quirky" means are missing out on an beauteous ally.
Brick: that's right, soldier! Underneath that pudgy, smelly exterior lies the center of a warrior!
Lindsay: (Clapping) we dear yous, Owen!!
Izzy: (Happy grunts) you're just so sugariness, I can't take it!!! (Fiercely bites into Owen's arm)
Owen: (Screams in pain… which then becomes a chuckle) hubba-hubba! (Pulls Izzy closer and the two start making out)
Chef: (Sighs) immature dear. (Leans over towards DJ'due south mom, who raises her pepper spray upwardly to Chef'south face; he backs off)
Samey: (Awkwardly) um… well uh… thanks for answering my question, guys. I'll just… become back my seat at present.
(Izzy and Owen stop kissing and wave at Samey)
Owen: cool. Thanks for existence here and asking me stuff, Samey! (Samey smiles)
Amy: (From the dorsum of the church) uh, loud reminding that I'chiliad here cough!!!
Owen: (Nervously) uh… and Amy! (Whispering to Samey) I don't really like Amy. (Samey giggles silently, gives Owen a hug, and then returns to her seat)
Heather: (Whispering to Alejandro) ok, I can barely stand him simply all the same… WE'RE his simply friends?!
Alejandro: I'd be more sympathetic if he wasn't such a butter-donkey.
Owen: (Takes a seat abreast Noah; Izzy sits in his lap. Owen shoots a thumbs upwards to Scott) skillful luck, buddy!
Scott: (Sits in the seat of dishing) finally! I've been waiting all solar day for this! You lot two better go far a short wedding, 'cus I got a LOT to talk about! (The clamps secure Scott to the chair)
Bridgette: (A little bellyaching) well someone's eager for a possible lie-filled bruising. Alright, Scott, I guess I'll start by saying this: you really villain'd it upwardly last season. I hateful tearing away at your own teammates, planting fake invincibility statues, blackmailing Mike…
Geoff: non exactly original in the dirty schemes section, but you still got guts, dude. (Scott smirks) But this flavour… you kinda downplayed it, bro! In fact all you did was get knocked out of your pants by everything Chris threw at you, and accept the backseat for other villains… and Mike! What'due south the deal, man?
Scott: …ok, so I got a piffling lazy at bein' a villain, large whoop! I don't need to SHOW that I'g a villain anymore, when I already proved I got the chops!
Anne Maria: (Smirking) aye, until that overgrown fish chewed you lot up with HIS chops!
Scott: hey! I'm telling you, that "FISH" is a psychotic eating machine! He's like if Owen and crazy chick over there had a giant fish baby!
Owen: DUDE! (Whispering) we oasis't even gone second base even so! (Izzy looks awkwardly abroad)
Dawn: oh I wouldn't hold such hostility towards Fang. If you tin can appeal to his better nature, he can be a real sweetie.
Noah: plus, dude, confront it; coordinated you are nowhere near. You're more accident-prone than a freight train with only two wheels running down a pair of frozen tracks filled with dynamite!
Scott: explosive?
Noah: disastrous! Face it, you're like if Tyler's pain magnet was cranked upwardly a few notches.
Tyler: hey! …expect, what's that mean for me?
Noah: oh you're However a mess… (Looks to Scott) he's but a lot messier.
Tyler: (Smirks) sweet! I'm cool with that!
Scott: pssh! Whatever! If we were back at the farm, I'd exist dancin' circles effectually you yellowish-bellies! (The catapult jerks forward a flake)
Bridgette: sure you want to stand by that story?
Scott: …ok yeah I'm all the same a clutz at that place too! Just you can't tell me I'd go any more hurt than I do on the show!
Owen: he's got a point there.
Cameron: at this indicate, it'd exist more logical if they but sent you a torso cast forth with the credence letter.
Courtney: (Rolls optics) assuming the producers care enough, or at all. (Doesn't observe Scott staring at her)
Geoff: (Catches Scott staring) which reminds me, bro, there's something else worth talking nigh this season… you and Courtney!
Scott: finally! Well we can start with how she drew me with a RAT'Southward TAIL!! Then we can talk about how she KISSED CAMERON while Nosotros were going out!!
Courtney: oh would y'all let information technology go, already?! I could've just drawn you with a donkey's face up… except I know at least five donkeys that are smarter than you! And for the infinite fourth dimension, CAMERON kissed ME!! (Scott glares at Cameron)
Cameron: …it'due south true. Would you believe I wasn't thinking at the time and Mal tricked me? (Hides lower in seat)
Scott: …probably. Just you better not be messin' with me! Practice I look stupid to you?!
Jo: …for one time, I don't have the heart to say it.
Bridgette: funny, Scott, Courtney DID do all that…
Geoff: and notwithstanding, you STILL got the hots for her!
Scott: (Starts sweating) uh… w-west-what? Don't know what you mean! (The catapult jerks forrad a bit)
Bridgette: oh really? The shoelace band, the staring …and even while yous guys were apart, yous STILL sent her texts every other Thursday! …Courtney told me about information technology.
Scott: look what?! (Glares at Courtney) you said you never got those texts!!
Courtney: (Giggles nervously) oops. And anyway, why would you lot keep sending me texts after I treated you so bad?! We broke upwardly …again!
Scott: uh, y-y-yeah! That'southward right! Which is why I wasn't texting you 'cus I LIKE you lot, I merely wanted to come across if I could bug you! (The catapult springs forrard, launching a balloon correct into Scott'southward lap. The balloon pops revealing a snapping turtle …that immediately chomps on Scott's kiwis. Scott hollers in pain and anybody else winces)
Jasmine: ooh! Right in the knackers!
Ella: oh my! (Covers her optics)
Max: (Cackles) wait at his face! (Points out Scott's confront twisted in pain)
Duncan: (Shivers) been there, done that, man.
(Scott tries speaking, only information technology only comes out in painful gasps)
Dawn: oh my! (Scoots upwardly to turtle) allow me. (Rubs the turtle'southward crush, information technology lets go of Scott's kiwis)
Scott: (Regains his vocalism) ok! Ok! Possibly I still similar you a little flake! (The audition gasps)
Courtney: WHAT?! …that is the WEIRDEST thing I've heard from you since we met! How tin you lot still like me after all that?!
Scott: …I don't know! Maybe it's because my family does junk for others, but I likes me some bossy ladies! And, I dunno, I gauge I missed information technology when you yelled at me and fabricated me do stuff I don't wanna practice. (Audience goes aww)
Courtney: (Slightly touched) w-wow, really? Cheers, Scott. I… I don't know what to say.
Justin: (Stands upwards) say zippo, because THAT is ridiculous!
Scott: (Glares at Justin) what was that, pretty-male child?!
Justin: you heard me, hillbilly!
Trent: (Groans) here he goes over again. Justin, we told you to get over that whole Courtney matter!
Justin: never! That day when Courtney clobbered me with a glass boot, I tell you it was a sign!
Noah: a sign that you've croaky?
Justin: no! A sign that it is Courtney and I who should exist together! (Beardo makes another dramatic sting noise) ok seriously, who keeps doing that? …Anyways, couldn't you lot all run across the sign? She single-handedly concluded my reign equally the well-nigh gorgeous being on the testify-
Beth: actually you kind of did that to yourself.
Justin: (Ignoring Beth) her beauty perfectly matches MY slowly crumbling beauty-
Courtney: should I be insulted?
Justin: plus, I REAAALLY like feisty! Courtney deserves a most handsome prince! Not some dirty pack mule!
Scott: (Breaks out of the chair clamps and gets upwardly in Justin's face) oh yes? Well hows about this pack mule packs a punch correct in your confront?!
Justin: sentinel it, dirtball! These perfectly manicured fists aren't just for prove!
(Both Justin and Scott growl and start sissy-slapping each other)
Courtney: wow …I never thought guys fighting over me would exist and then… boring. And annoying! (To Duncan) how'd you put up with THIS?
Duncan: (Scowls) no idea.
Bridgette: (Trying to break the two up) guys, come up on! Give it a rest! Don't fight like this!
Chris: (Fully recovered, sits back upwardly) are you lot kidding? THIS is MY kind of reunion! (Chuckles cryptically)
Duncan: (Disappointed) aww. I thought you lot were dead.
Chris: (glares at Duncan) you, Gwen, Heather, and at least two of my ex-girlfriends wish. Anywho, I vowed with my hand on a jar of McLean-make styling gel that I would deliver a dramatic reunion full of humiliation and hurting! Nosotros got plenty of humiliation to kicking, simply at present information technology'due south time to bring forth the pain!
Scott: (Smirking) good! Cus I tin take annihilation this pretty-male child prude can dish!
Justin: I tin take anything too! …every bit long every bit it'due south not in the (Points out diverse parts of body as he names them) confront, neck, hands, anxiety, legs, knees, thumbs, ears, or anything in the chestal region!
Scott: what about your butt? Can I boot your butt?
Justin: …my barrel-modeling contract never got renewed this month so… (Sighs reluctantly) go ahead. (Scott pulls his foot back ready to kicking)
Chris: upward-up-up-up! who said anything about you lot kicking EACH OTHER'S shiny red butts?
Scott: (Confused) uh… we did?
Justin: yeah, you lot know, the whole fighting for Courtney's honor affair?
Chris: nuh-uh. A fight betwixt you 2 featherweights would be boooring! Luckily, as usual, I've got an even BETTER idea! (Chef easily Justin and Scott 2 jousting sticks) instead of fighting each other-
Bridgette: uh, Chris, should I fifty-fifty TRY to say how I experience about all this?
Chris: nope.
Bridgette: (Annoyed) alright then. (Backs off)
Chris: you two get to fight my next surprise invitee… Saccharide!
(Gestures stage right, and a large blonde girl with a curt pink elevation and bluish jeans runs in with another jousting stick)
Sugar: yaaaaa-hoo! Alright, ya'll! Who wants a piece of the Saccharide! 'cus I'll mess ya up worse than a jigsaw puzzle in a blender!
(Justin and Scott but look dislocated)
Justin: …um, what? We're supposed to fight THAT?!
Scott: (Confident) pfft, big whoop. She doesn't look and so tough.
Sugar: (Scowls) oh yeah? Well ya'll won't be squawkin' when I turn ya both into dirt clods! (Spins her stick in her hand and then gets into a battle pose)
Sam: (Slightly impressed) whoa. Was she a actor on Canadian Gladiators?
Chris: even amend, Sam. Sugar hither'south a sometime beauty pageant queen!
(Anybody except Scott gasps. Backstage in the girls' room, Gwen gags a little)
Zoey: (Looks concerned) Gwen? Are you lot okay?
Gwen: (Swallows) …I only threw up a bit in my oral fissure.
(Cut back onstage)
Izzy: (Covers Owen's eyes) don't await in her optics, big guy! She's PURE EVIL!!!
Noah: (Clings to Dawn) May lord take mercy on our souls!!
Scott: (Confused) …what? Some sissy beauty contest queen? (Elbows Justin) I bet even YOU can take her!
Justin: (Backs off) Scott, no! Bad! Very bad! Dazzler pageant queens are some of the scariest girls known to man!
Alejandro: once they step on that phase, they plough from somewhat normal confident señoritas, into bloodthirsty brujas inhumanas!
Beth: what, you lot hateful like Heather and Courtney?
Sierra: endeavour Heather and Courtney… times 1000!
Heather/Courtney: (Offended) hey!
Sugar: wait, what do you lot mean "former" queen, Chris?! I'm still the reignin' queen of the pageants; and I'm gonna win this here pageant as well!
Brick: (Whispering to Dawn) she knows this isn't a pageant, right?
Dawn: she's locked into a delusion from her previous wins… or at least what she assumed were wins.
Scott: (Not backing downwardly) Courtney and Heather wannabe or non, I ain't gonna be taken downward by some sissy dazzler contest has-been!
Sugar: (Getting angry) what!? I ain't no HAS-BEEN! And you're writin' checks your donkey can't chew up and spit out, dirt male child!
(Everyone looks confused)
Scott: …what?
Noah: (Irritated) those weren't even words!!
Carbohydrate: I own't got time for no spellin' lesson, I gotta FREE THE Beast!!! (Gives a victory holler and and then charges at Scott and Justin)
Justin: (Trying to back away) uh… on 2d idea, Courtney's great and all, but no daughter is worth… (Sugar pile drives on Justin and Scott, then starts chirapsia them downwardly off-screen)
Scott: (Screaming in hurting) Assistance! I'M GETTING TAKEN Downwards BY SOME SISSY Dazzler CONTEST HAS-BEEN!!!!
(Everyone cringes and winces at the fight… but Duncan smiles at the brandish)
Geoff: (Awkwardly) uh, you retrieve maybe we oughta go some security out here?
Bridgette: sorry, Geoff. But they're all too busy keeping the outside secured from the fans… or Blaineley.
Geoff: then ...what now?
Bridgette: uh… perhaps we should take a quick break. (Looks to camera) but when we come up back, nosotros're finally interviewing the terminal three-
Chris: (Pops up from the left) THEN my super wicked surprise- (Pops back down)
Geoff: and then finally, WEDDING TIME, BABY! (Chuckles) so you lot exercise NOT wanna miss the terminal leg of our Total Drama All-Stars Reunion! (Looks again at the fight) …seriously, tin can ANYONE help pause these iii up?!
Chris: (Chuckles) best backwash EVEEEER!
(Commercial break)
(Later on the commercial ends, we cut dorsum to the stage… Geoff and Bridgette look extremely awkward at the camera)
Bridgette: uh… aaaaand we're back to… hopefully the last leg of the Aftermath.
Geoff: things got super MEGA harsh when Chris' guest, Sugar, went toe to toe with Justin and Scott.
(Zoom out to show that Justin has been hogtied with the dueling sticks wrapped around his wrists and ankles. Sugar meanwhile stands triumphantly on Scott's back… both boys look horribly beaten up)
Geoff: (Trying not to chuckle) and, to be honest, I'm yet trying to figure out how THIS went down! (Chuckles)
Justin: …I'k honestly curious too. I hateful… she only took the jousting sticks and then she did THIS! HOW?!
Scott: (Straining) I'll tell ya after she's done crushing my pelvis!
Dave: …I'1000 trying to become the image of it out of my encephalon… but at the aforementioned time I want to know more than.
Sugar: YAAAA-HOO! And I win again! (Starts jumping up and down on Scott'south dorsum) Who put these two skunks down in the mud pit? SUGAR DID!!!
Scott: (Groans) it's only like dorsum on the farm when Pappy and our neighbour's cow broke their legs. Mama carried Pappy… and I carried the cow!
Heather: yep, well it looks like you're conveying ANOTHER cow. (The audience "ooh'southward" at Heather's sassiness)
Sugar: (Gets upward in Heather's face) what?! Who you callin' a cow, scarecrow?! Why I'll compel you lot faster than a raccoon can pick at garbage!
Heather: those aren't even real analogies! And if this were a real "beauty competition," I would've squashed you similar a bug nether my heel!
Sugar: oh, is that and then? Well how'due south about we see you try to beat me in a skillful ol' WRASSTLIN PAGEANT!!!!
Heather: (Stands from her seat) bring information technology, Bessie!
(Heather and Saccharide try to pounce at each other, but Alejandro holds Heather back, while DJ, Brick, and LeShawna concord Sugar back)
Ella: uh… if it'll help, even thought it was a tiddly-scrap mean, I personally enjoyed Carbohydrate's performance.
Sugar: (Off-screen) NO ONE ASKED Y'all!!! (Throws one of her heels at Ella, narrowly missing her)
(DJ'due south mama walks up to the struggling Sugar, and pinches the back of Sugar's neck. Saccharide twitches, and then falls forward, going unconscious)
Duncan: aww, it was just well-nigh to get bloody.
Izzy: oooh! Can you teach me how to practise that?
Alejandro: (Smirking at Heather) me too? (Heather sticks her tongue out at Alejandro)
DJ's Mother: (Conveying Sugar to the back) nah-ah! Information technology's a merchandise secret that merely me, my lilliputian Poopy-Doo, and his brothers know about. (Notices Chef gawking at her) you lot gonna know it too if you don't get outta my face! (Chef backs off)
Chris: (Snickers) romantic tension. My favorite… correct next to painful tension! Which reminds me, (Turns to Courtney) and so, Courtney, (Referring to Justin and Scott) these 2 washout gladiators just got the fudge crush out of them, all for you. So, who you gonna selection, bonehead number one or bonehead number… (Notices Justin hogtied) yeesh?
Justin: (Exasperated) you lot know what, Scott… y'all can accept Courtney. My effort to restore my beautiful temple is going to accept all my try.
Noah: to restore THAT temple, you're gonna need to drop out of college, Jaja. (Smirks)
Justin: …I detest you.
Scott: (Straining, throws his arm up in victory) yep! I –ow- win!
Courtney: (Awkwardly stands up) um, actually, Scott… we need to talk.
Scott: (Moans) please tell me you're not choosing that… fruit bar, are you?
Courtney: what, NO! Of course not! I'm sorry, but I'g choosing NEITHER of you! (Everyone gasps, and Beardo does another dramatic sting sound effect. Courtney throws her shoe at him, knocking him over)
Scott: what?! But… but I idea-
Courtney: Scott, I'm sorry, only I merely don't think I'thou ready for Any type of relationship on THIS evidence… at least until I tin can observe a guy who DOESN'T add more drama into my life! (Duncan looks relieved) plus, seriously, if you're gonna treat me as a prize, you could at least TRY to work hard at information technology!
Scott: but I… but I wanted…. (Sighs) yeah, ok. I getcha.
Courtney: (Looks a little worried) simply uh… nosotros can still exist friend-ish. (Scott smiles hopefully) …just, non if nosotros're ever out in public, ok?
Scott: (Gets up and cracks dorsum. Looks downwardly) aye, I get that. No probs. (Courtney awkwardly sits dorsum down, looking worried)
Chris: (Faking business organisation) hey, it'south gonna be ok, Scott. Because I'm hither to practice what any responsible host would do after ane of their former contestants has his heart ripped out… brand it even worse!! (Pulls out a remote and presses a button) how near a little heart-to-centre with your old buddy, Fang? (A square hole opens nether the floor and a platform rises… lifting a sneering Fang up. Fang takes 1 wait at Scott and smiles menacingly. Anybody gasps)
Geoff: come up on! Seriously? This is in poor gustatory modality even for you, dude!
Chris: I know! Skilful, aren't I?
(Fang opens his behemothic jaw widely, merely Scott but looks bellyaching instead of afraid)
Scott: not at present!!
(Scott punches Fang hard on the nose. Fang just stands there looking dislocated… and so his eyes start watering. Fang starts tearful loudly and runs off the stage to the back door, leaving a Fang-shaped hole in the wall. Everyone looks at Scott in shock)
Cameron: …wow! Remarkable, Scott! Yous finally beat Fang!
Scott: (Uninterested as he strolls over to the bleachers and sits down) yes, yes. whoop-de-doo for me. Can we get this over with so we can all go domicile?!
Geoff: yeah, seriously! BROTHER'S GOTTA Marry HIS SUPER Crawly Infant AND And then PARTYYYY!!!! (Pouts, causing Bridgette to giggle)
(Meanwhile, DJ and Brick undo the jousting sticks restricting Justin's arms and legs, setting him gratuitous)
Justin: (Notices his swollen wrists and ankles and screams) I am a hideously bloated animal!!!!
Alejandro: (Smirks) yes, merely on the plus side, your symmetry has never looked better.
Justin: (Crazed) oh certain, laugh information technology up now! Oh, but i 24-hour interval, your Latin dazzler's gonna go sour, and yous'll be simply like me!! And so you lot'll come across! You'll ALL see!!! (Cackles, while everyone else looks freaked out)
Beth: …I'thou starting to question that shell I had on Justin years ago.
LeShawna/Eva/Katie/Sadie/Lindsay/Owen: same hither. (The girls give Owen a strange look as he looks around awkwardly)
Trent: Focus, Justin! We got bigger problems! We're playing the reception later on the wedding ceremony and we Demand you on tambourine!
Cody: yeah, are your hands ok enough to play?
Justin: (Snaps out of his craziness and wiggles his fingers) …uh-oh. Uh, not actually.
Trent: "non actually" how?
Justin: "non really" in the sense that I can't even feel my fingers!!
Cody: what?! But, merely we NEED his tambourine to play tonight!
Harold: (Cringes) no such luck. He'll be lucky if he can moisturize his easily.
Justin: (Groans) and my adept luck continues.
Owen: well, tin can't you lot guys go another tambourine guy?
Trent: no such luck, bro. Nosotros got new band contracts proverb we can't substitute band mates anymore… (Glares at Cody) gauge whose bonehead idea THAT was!
Cody: what?! How was I supposed to know THIS was gonna happen?
Harold: in other words… we're hosed! Large time!
Chris: (Fakes worry) aw gee, sorry… Not my trouble! (Chuckles maniacally while the Drama Brothers glare at him)
Trent: (To Geoff and Bridgette) aw man. I'm sad, guys. At present nosotros tin't play at the reception.
Geoff: (Nervously) w-well… non to worry, bros. 'Cus we always got a backup plan… (Whispering to Bridgette) we got a fill-in programme, right?
Bridgette: (Calm) don't worry, hon. I always have a backup… (Turns to photographic camera) but starting time, we shouldn't go on the Final Three waiting backstage!
Geoff: (Calmed down) true that, Bridge-baby! 'Cus finally, nosotros've fabricated it to the final 3 interviews of the night!
Bridgette: anybody who competed this season worked their hardest, but these three were the ones who made it to the top as our Total Drama All-Stars!
(A familiar instrumental starts to play in the groundwork)
Geoff: and so let's take a little looksie at what brought these 3 to the elevation every bit our ultimate all-stars!
(The monitor flickers on and shows a montage of Gwen, Zoey, and Mike in activity all throughout the season, while the song Gwen performed in the concert challenge plays over. The clips include: Gwen fending off the deer in the moon challenge, Zoey tossing the final puzzle piece at the Statue of Freedom puzzle in the earthworks challenge, Mal-Svetlana spinning Alejandro on his feet on the Obsta-Kill Kourse, Gwen striking Ezekiel with the meatball bazooka in the mines, Zoey and Mike auditioning in the concert episode, Zoey and Mike performing in the very same episode, Gwen rocking out in the very aforementioned episode, Zoey defending Courtney in the dodge ball episode, Mike as Manitoba excavation in the beach episode, Gwen clocking Chris in the face up with a dodge ball in the dodgeball episode, Zoey leeching Jo in the Leechball episode, Mike punching out Fang in the finale, and finally Gwen/Zoey/Mike [Depending on your ending of pick] pulling the sword out of the rock in the finale. The audience and peanut gallery applaud loudly as the montage ends)
Bridgette: then, without any further ado, our finalists…
Bridgette/Geoff: Mike, Zoey, and Gwen!!!!
(Anybody applauds as Gwen, Zoey, and Mike brand their way to the stage. All iii of them look a trivial awkward as anybody applauds, merely they moving ridge anyway)
Zoey: (Whispering to Gwen) was your Backwash experience this… friendly?
Gwen: (Whispering back) I wish.
Bridgette: (Runs right up to Gwen and pulls her into a hug) Gwen!! (Squeals. Gwen chuckles and hugs back) can yous believe information technology?
Gwen: all I can say is it's most fourth dimension! (She and Bridgette giggle)
Zoey: (Awkwardly puts hand on Bridgette's shoulder) uh… hi. It's really great to meet you both, and I only wanted to say "congrats." (This makes Bridgette smile)
Mike: (Extends his mitt to Geoff) yeah. We're both SUPER excited for the two of you.
Geoff: aw no you lot don't, bro. Yous're part of the TD family now and then… (Opens arms) come up on! Bring it in here! (Pulls Mike into a tight bear hug) Come on! Evidence me some bro love!
Mike: (Getting squeezed) yeah! Ok! I'm feeling the love! Simply could you lot loosen information technology up a bit?
(Mike gasps, switching to Chester)
Chester: nyeh! Allow me become, ya crazy sawed-off moondawg hippy!!
Geoff: oops! Sorry, old dude! (Lets go of Chester, causing him to fall to the ground. Chester gasps, switching back to Mike)
Mike: (Chuckles awkwardly) sorry well-nigh that. Chester gets a little cranky around people… and away from people… and at fast nutrient restaurants… and well-nigh video games… in fact, if he sees someone playing video games while eating fast food at the same time, he could not hate them more.
Geoff: 'sall expert, dude. I shouldn't try to bro hug the elderly …even if it'south some dude who's got an elderly dude in his brain. …Whoa, my brain hurts.
Alejandro: it doesn't have a lot to do that, doesn't it? (Jo snickers)
Bridgette: (Ignoring Alejandro) we won't waste anymore time. And so, who wants to go first?
Zoey: (Hastily) Mike does!
Mike: (Not listening) yes, Mike does. (Realizes what he said) look… I exercise?!
Bridgette: yeah, come on. Information technology'll be easy. You've seen the prove, right? Just answer a few questions and information technology'll be over like that.
Chris: (Rolls eyes) yeah, it'll be easy-peasy… unless I have my manner… and I will. (Grins wickedly)
(Mike notices Chris' grin and immediately stands back up, pulling Zoey shut by her shoulders)
Mike: (Whispering) Zoey! Please don't brand me practise this! I can't face these guys after what I did! (Notices Heather, Alejandro, Lightning, Jo, Anne Maria, Courtney, and Scott glaring at him) especially THOSE guys!
Zoey: (Puts her easily over Mike's) Mike, please! Whatever's on your mind, talking most information technology might aid yous feel meliorate. If yous won't do it for yous, will yous at least do information technology for me?
Mike: (Avoiding center contact) well… I… I mean, I can't… (Zoey gives Mike her biggest pair of puppy dog eyes. Mike sighs reluctantly) …that is And then non fair. (Zoey smiles brightly. Mike turns and walks to the seat of dishing) ok. Permit'southward just go this over with. (Sits down in the seat, ignores the clamps clasping onto him) It's everything I deserve, and then HIT ME WITH YOUR Best SHOT!!! (Closes his eyes and winces, expecting pain)
Bridgette: (Looks confused and concerned) uh… ok? First question… how're you doing, Mike?
Mike: (Loosens up, looks confused) wait, THAT'S the offset question?
Geoff: well aye, bro. We saw you had it mega-harshly the last few episodes, so we thought we'd aid yous chillax, ya know? Kinda SMOOOTH into the crude stuff.
Mike: oh… well (Looks around nervously) uh, I'm doing good. Uh, YUP! Everything'due south all peachy-smashing! (The catapult jerks forward a little. Mike cringes)
Zoey: (Concerned) are y'all SURE you're doing ok, Mike?
Mike: (Sweating) uh… eeyup, nothing to worry nigh hither! (The catapult jerks forward a fleck more) well, possibly not a whole lot? (The catapult jerks fifty-fifty more) ok at that place IS something, but I don't wanna talk about it!! (The catapult relaxes all the style dorsum. Mike sighs in relief)
Zoey: Mike! Seriously, you know yous can talk to me about anything, right?
Bridgette: aye, seriously, we're all friends here. (Zoey, Owen, Cameron, Brick, Dawn, and Sam all grin and nod… while Heather, Alejandro, Lightning, Jo, Anne Maria, Courtney, and Scott continue glaring at Mike) …well, well-nigh of the states.
Chris: (Faking comfort) yeah, Mike. You can talk about anything… (Smirks) you lot wanna start with how yous DIDN'T tell Zoey about your multiple personalities until the terminal minute last flavor?
Mike: (Defensively) that was different! I didn't desire her to recollect I was some kind of freak!
Scott: (Smirking) which, you however kinda are. (LeShawna smacks him upside the head)
Mike: she knows about it now, right?
Chris: yep, after CAMERON told her… and Scott.
Cameron: (Meekly) still lamentable about that.
Chris: ooh, or what about how you didn't tell ANYONE near the deranged CRIMINAL living in your head? (Mike starts shrinking in the seat) or how about how you nearly permit said psycho criminal most kill all of your best friends… and Alejandro.
Noah: eh, that last ane's not that large a loss. (Alejandro glares at Noah now)
Zoey: Chris! Seriously! Don't you think Mike's suffered enough?
Chris: nope! Not in the least! And none of you can make me… (Suddenly, a familiar growling audio is heard and Chris looks frightened. He screams and jumps into Chef'southward arms) HEEELP!! THE NASTY FREAKY ZEKE IS GONNA KILL ME!!!
(Anybody laughs at Chris' fear. Pan over to Ezekiel, who was making the monster noises, equally he high-fives Duncan. Chris hastily leaps out of Chef's arms and dusts himself off)
Chris: fine! Whatever! Spoil my fun, Again! We got a question for Mike from our audience anyhow. (All of a sudden, a skinny arm from behind Chris easily him a flashcard. Chris looks over it and scowls) uh-uh. No mode. Not saying it!
????: Merely say it! I control thee!
Chris: (Hands Chef the flashcard) Y'all say it.
Chef: (Rolls his optics and reads the cue card) "Veneficus, apparet, continuo," or whatever. "Behold, Leonard, the mighty sorcerer."
(The skinny arm from behind throws down a scattering of flash pulverization, and from the grit appears a skinny kid in a green robe with a fake beard)
Leonard: appearicus!!! Greetings, oh off-white maidens and dauntless warriors.
(Everyone looks freaked out)
Dave: …we're all seeing this, correct? It'southward not just me, right?
Scarlett: I am indeed seeing it… I just don't know what to say about information technology.
Lindsay: (In disbelief) oh my, boxers! Are you a REAL wizard!? (Heather facepalms)
Leonard: (Smugly) indeed I am, m'lady. I know MANY spells, and have defeated armies of vampires and demons from the darkest mountains of Ravenscroft, using nix but a level 11 firebolt spell.
(Harold, Noah, Sierra, and Sam all groan)
Sam: aw man, not another ane of these guys!
Sierra: (Rolls eyes) ANOTHER LARPer?
Tyler: uh, what's a LARPer?
Noah: it means live-action role-player. Now role-playing's actually not that bad on the Internet… least it helps y'all escape reality for a while.
Sam: but live-action part-players are the most annoying kind! They apparel up as their characters and go effectually pretending to be them in existent life!
Harold: and they get so caught upwardly in the function, it's similar all of reality has melted abroad! So, you lot remember I'Chiliad annoying? Try having to deal with me 100 times worse!
Sierra: information technology's super embarrassing! (Looks embarrassed) plus, if I dressed upwards similar MY online character in real life, I'd probably get arrested. (Giggles sheepishly)
Leonard: (Indignantly) non-believers! We'll see who'southward laughing when the great creature comes to devour ALL you lot foolish naives!
Duncan: …OK THAT IS NOT Fair! The One day I can't trounce anyone up, and you dangle THIS in front of my face?! (Groans and pouts. Gwen just snickers)
Leonard: (Mumbles nether breath) yeah, good luck getting past my force field spell. (Out loud to Mike) so, Michael…
Mike: uh, information technology's merely Mike, actuall-
Leonard: SILENCE!!!! I notice you are the human of many identities. The Beast with a THOUSAND faces of old!
Zoey: hey! Don't phone call Mike a fauna!
Leonard: SILEEEENCE…. AGAAAIN! I wish to know… could you teach me the spell that lets you change your voice similar that?
Mike: (Slightly offended) spell?! SPELL?! The personalities aren't just part of some make-believe wizard thing! They are real people! Real people that are a function of me! And One of those real people nearly cost me all my friends AND THE COOLEST Girl I EVER MET!!! (Covers his mouth in horror equally anybody gasps. Beardo imitates a record scratch dissonance)
Zoey: (Shocked) …M-Mike? Is THAT what's been bothering you?
Mike: (Sighs) yeah, y'all got me.
Owen: aww, c'mon, buddy, it wasn't your fault that Mal was… super spooky.
Mike: (Groans) I know, Owen… but you don't get information technology! Getting to meet you, compete with my friends, and being with Zoey again were the best things that happened to me this season… and I almost botched information technology all up considering of my stupid brain!
Zoey: (Offended) your encephalon isn't stupid! And yeah things went wrong…
Mike: Zoey, I like you, A LOT, but you are existence TOO NICE about all this! I never felt more useless, even since the beginning! When I couldn't access my other personalities, I idea I lost the start friends I ever had! Add to it, when Mal started taking over… I had no idea that he was using my torso to suspension my friends' stuff or to injure them (Owen winces at this)! And then Mal finally got control, (Mike'southward optics offset watering) and all I could do was only sit in my hidden while that monster had free-reign to hurt my friends… and Alejandro, AND push Zoey away!
Zoey: (Her eyes start watering) 1000-Mike. Listen…
Mike: -and the worst function? If I become conked on the caput again… Mal might come dorsum! I can't take that risk! I don't wanna hurt my friends once more! And if he hurt Zoey… I'd never, E'er forgive my-
(Before Mike tin can finish, Zoey kneels down and slaps him right across the face. Gwen, Bridgette, and Geoff wince at the slap)
Mike: …ok, I MIGHT'VE deserved that.
Zoey: (Tears leaking downward her face) Mike, just close upward and LISTEN to me for a minute!
Mike: (Calmer) listening.
Zoey: (Calms downwards and wipes her optics) adept. Now, Mike, I know yous're worried most Mal coming dorsum… but you know what I say? (Looking confident) I say LET him come up! (Everyone gasps in shock)
Mike: wait… what?
Zoey: I'm serious! I'm not gonna be afraid of some wannabe criminal who thinks it's absurd to bully my Mike!!
Mike: Zoey, I… (Realizes what she said and blushes) …wait, YOUR Mike?
(Owen, Dawn, and Gwen lean in mischievously while Zoey looks back and forth awkwardly)
Zoey: (Crosses her arms and huffs) yes, I said it. No regrets. Anyways, yes I know Mal is a dangerous freak… but here's the matter; he may be a part of your hidden, but that doesn't hateful he's you. You're better than him. The Mike I love cares for the people effectually him; even the jerks… like Scott.
Scott: hey!
Zoey: and fifty-fifty if Mal does come back, I know you can beat him… yous did it once, and you'll do information technology over again. (Mike smiles as his clamps come undone, and he pulls Zoey into a tight hug. The audience "awws" as a response)
Cameron: (Wipes his eyes) I beloved happy endings. (Clings to DJ and starts bawling. Notices DJ and retreats) oops. Lamentable.
DJ: (Shrugs) eh, who am I to gauge? (Ruffles Cameron'due south head)
Dawn: if information technology helps, Mike, I've taken a peek within… and I don't think Mal shall be getting out for a long, long time.
Mike: (Looks up at his forehead hopefully) really?
(Zoom into Mike's hidden… into a jail cell made out of brain thing. Mal is all tied upwardly in Manitoba'south rope)
Mal: (Struggling) I can't believe this! I was THIS close! THIS Close! To winning the meg, to getting Mike out of my life for good; I COULD'VE BEEN THE KING!!!
Svetlana: (Right outside the cell door with Manitoba, Vito, and Chester) ya? Vell at present you are being ze king of getting your posterior kicked past usa!
Manitoba: (Opens the door) oh, I love this part of the job! So, who's upward first?
Vito: Ayo, I wanted to try dis new knuckle squeegee move on his face!
Svetlana: begging your pardon? But it is ladies first, later on all!
Chester: good, become us a lady and she can go first! (Chuckles while Svetlana glares at him)
Manitoba: ok then… first one in throws the start punch?
Chester/Vito/Svetlana: Deal!!!
(They all race in and the door slams shut. A series of punching sounds are heard)
Mal: (In pain) when I become out of here, it'll –ow- be MY TIME!!! OW!! Hey! Non in the Kiwis! (Gives a loftier-pitched squeal)
(Cut back to the aftermath)
Geoff: (Confused) ok, seriously, how're we getting all that footage inside Mike's caput?
Bridgette: I… don't know, honestly! We REALLY demand to take a talk with the editors!
Leonard: (Pops upward right adjacent to Gwen holding a stick; keeps accidentally poking Gwen with the stick) I know the very spell that volition allow us to see that! Encephalon-ICUS! APPEAR-ICUS! PATRON-ICUS!!! (An bellyaching Gwen grabs the stick and breaks information technology in 2) …well, that wasn't very lady-like! (Gwen growls at Leonard) ..DISAPPER-ICUS!!! (Runs dorsum to his seat)
Bridgette: (Clears throat) anyways, Zoey, you lot're upwards!
Zoey: huh? Oh, right! Sure! Uh, (Clears throat) ok, I'm a little nervous near getting interviewed, but… yous know, what the heck?
Mike: (Gets up from the chair) expert luck! (Awkwardly) …Not that you'll need it, but uh… I'one thousand gonna go sit downward at present. (Zoey giggles a bit every bit she sits in the seat of dishing, while Mike takes his place in the bleachers)
Zoey: (Trying to sound tough) alright… hit me with your all-time shot!! (Sheepishly) …If that'southward ok with you, I hateful.
Bridgette: (Giggles) y'all heard her, Geoff, permit her accept information technology.
Geoff: gotcha, babe! (Turns to Zoey) and then, Zoey… SUPER stoked to have yous here.
Zoey: aww thanks. Stoked to be here too! And I always idea that hat looks awesome on you lot!
Bridgette: (Smiles at the hat) I know.
Geoff: which brings me to my first bespeak… undoubtedly You lot are one of the nicest contestants on the show! (Zoey smiles) But LAST flavor, you didn't exactly Own a lot of the challenges.
Zoey: uh, what do yous mean?
Jo: (Smirks) I retrieve he'southward talking near how YOU kept playing the apology-spitting damsel in distress, and Multiple-Mike had to save your butt more than than I change my track suits!
Heather: (Fans her nose) which isn't enough, by the manner.
Zoey: (Insulted) oh come on! I wasn't THAT bad… was I?
Geoff/Bridgette: (Awkwardly) weeell….
(The monitor flickers on showing a series of Zoey's spills in flavor 4; including: her falling off the totem pole, getting snared by the giant spider, falling off a cliff, getting her head pulled into a saucepan, getting attacked past her living salad, and falling off the roof of one of the cabins, but to be caught by Mike. As the monitor shuts off, Zoey blushes in embarrassment while Heather, Alejandro, Jo, Lightning, Courtney, and Scott laugh at her)
Zoey: oye. Y'all're right; I WAS a mess.
Lightning: "was?" Pssh, daughter, yous still a sha-spaz!
Eva: (Sneers) you oughta know, spaz!
Zoey: (Giggles) good one, Eva. (Eva merely glares at her, Zoey shrinks) …ooookay so. Yes, I know, I've never had the "middle of the tiger" for contests like Courtney, Heather, and Jo do, (Courtney smirks proudly) only I don't think I had to have it. Yeah, the coin'south just icing on the block-
Owen: (Perks up) cake you lot say?
Zoey: (Giggles, and so continues) but I was Actually looking forward to getting to compete with my old friends like Mike or Cameron (Mike and Cameron high-v). AND I got to make awesome new friends like Owen and Gwen (Owen and Gwen smile). I'd say non bad for an only child, huh?
Sam: (Shoots Zoey a thumbs up) hecks yeah!
Chris: (Looks bored) yawn. If we're all done with the "Zoey is crawly" hour, we got a question from a (Looks at flashcard) …Sky?
???: Right hither!
(From somewhere in the audience, a small but athletically built girl with a purple dewdrop necklace, red plume earrings, purple sneakers, and black gym pants somersaults in front of Chris and Chef)
Sky: (Breathes out) and dismount.
Zoey: (Amazed) wow! Really nice class!
Sky: thanks; I owe that to my sister (Waves at the camera). So, Zoey, I noticed you had A LOT of athletic moves yourself. (Zoey blushes) did dating Mike assist yous accomplish those, or did you learn those moves from somewhere else?
Zoey: actually, I got a lot of those moves from my mom. She was an athlete too; she wanted to utilise her athleticism to assistance build her confidence.
Anne Maria: (Muttering) too bad that didn't work for you, Red.
Zoey: …I didn't inherit EVERYTHING from my mom; just her athleticism… and her motherly instincts… and a BIT of anger when pushed over the edge.
Cameron: really? Is THAT where the whole Commando Zoey thing came from?
Zoey: (Shrinks a bit) …yep, that's where I got information technology. It doesn't happen a lot, but it's NOT something I'm proud of.
Sky: actually? Because if I had a… Commando Sky in me, I'd be extremely proud of that! Don't be afraid to unleash the beast! Don't let anyone push yous around! And, don't let yourself get doey-eyed and distracted by cute guys! Ever!! (Notices Zoey looking dislocated at her) but uh… merely your way worked for yous too. So uh… (Thumbs up) good job on your stop. (Rubs the back of her neck awkwardly, and walks back to her seat. She doesn't notice Dave staring at her with a goofy look on his face)
Zoey: (Stands dorsum up as her clamps are undone) well, that wasn't likewise bad.
Bridgette: (Puts manus on Zoey'southward shoulder) come across? I told you lot and then.
Gwen: (Smirks) well, since I've already paid my dues on this bear witness, how about nosotros FINALLY get to this wedding?
Chris: ah-ah-ah. Not so fast, Gwendo- (Notices Gwen glaring at him) uh… Gwen! You may take paid your dues with all the interrogating, BUT you still gotta respond ane concluding audience question before I get out of your pilus… forever! Or until I need a laugh, any comes first.
Gwen: (Rolls her eyes) fine. Whatever. Who am I answering for?
Chris: my very last guest (Looks at flashcard) …Shawn!
(Chris steps aside, and a skinny boy wearing an orange vest over his shirt and a green beanie steps up. He looks a little paranoid)
Shawn: (Waves) hey. First off, information technology'due south actually peachy to come across yous, Gwen. Liked your work on the show, and I really beloved how you have a great understanding of the freaky and the creepy!
Gwen: heh. Thanks; I endeavor my best. So, what's your question?
Shawn: oh aye. Ok, this is the most important question I've always asked anyone… (Looks around, and so leaps in front of Gwen) ok, picture this in your encephalon! The zombie apocalypse has finally come, you've been separated from your party, and you're most to exist cornered by a horde of walkers! What exercise yous use for a weapon?
Anne Maria: …is he being serious? He CANNOT be serious!
Courtney: seriously?! THAT'S your "super important question!?" (Groans) Gwen, you're not seriously gonna dignify his question with a response, are yous?
Gwen: why non? That's actually a absurd question! (Turns back to Shawn) me personally, I'd utilise something silent but mortiferous… like a katana! That way I'd clean off those zombie heads without attracting the rest of the horde!
Shawn: ooh, playing it condom and deadly. I like that! You've got brains …unfortunately, that makes you a bigger target for the zombies.
Jo: (Whispering to Lightning) guess that makes Y'all rubber, Rudolph. (Lightning scowls)
Lindsay: (Gasps) oh my, gosh! Does that mean the zombies will come later on me too?! (Beth and Tyler look abroad awkwardly)
Duncan: pssh, I don't care. I say bring on the hordes! I'd have 'em on with a …a flaming chainsaw! Just like the one used in Zombie Summertime Camp Breakfast 5!
Gwen: no way! That's only THE all-time zombie movie of all time! Ooh, I love the zombie that had 3 different arms sewed onto his sides! They grabbed onto that dude… and literally RIPPED him in half!!! (Cameron and Zoey squeak in fright. Gwen sighs) good times.
Duncan: yes, personally my favorite zombie was the freaky butcher 1 with THE Claw!!! (Holds out his right manus holding his erstwhile claw prop right in front end of Shawn. Shawn shrieks in fright …and and so delivers a swift kick to Duncan'southward jaw. Anybody cringes in hurting) OW!!! OVER THE LINE, Man! Not Absurd!!
Gwen: (Snickers) well, you DID freak him out.
Shawn: (Looks embarrassed) oh uh… lamentable. Guess I just got a little… (Duncan glares him downward) uh… I'm gonna… get back to my seat now before I bring together the undead, early. (Dashes back to seat)
Sky: (Whispering to Jasmine) hey, do you think that guy was serious about the whole "zombie" thing?
Jasmine: (Snickering) nah. I think he'southward only jokin'. Besides, did you see that corker kick? (Sighs lovingly; notices Sky looking dislocated) Aspersion? I-information technology means something'south bonza? (Sky looks more dislocated. Jasmine looks defeated) …he did a skillful kick. (To herself) and he'south kinda cute.
Gwen: (Sighs) well, I came, I saw, I answered the question, so how near that nuptials?
Topher: (Suddenly stands up) not so fast!!! (Everyone in the church looks toward Topher. Topher approaches Gwen from up the alley) not so fast, Gwenny. My last bit of gossip may take been a no-go… merely I got peculiarly juicy clay on you! AND your little punk boyfriend!
Gwen: seriously? (Groans) give it up! Everyone already knows most the stupid things we've done!
Heather: yeah. I'm with her on this ane. We've already seen everything virtually these 2… what else tin can you POSSIBLY have?
Topher: I'thou glad y'all asked, because last week, I defenseless footage of …THIS!!!
(The monitor flickers on, and it shows Duncan in his sleepwear walking towards a mailbox. Nobody looks impressed, simply Duncan and Gwen look nervous)
Noah: (Gasps sarcastically) oh my, gosh! This truly IS scandalous …DUNCAN'Southward GETTING THE MAIL!!! (Pretends to faint into Owen'southward artillery) I cannot stand the juicy clay that comes from this! (Owen snickers)
Courtney: …really? THIS is all you can give the states? Honestly, I knew the gossip world was getting desperate, but this is just sad.
Topher: (Still looking smug) take a closer look at the mailbox.
Katie: (Takes a closer look at the mailbox on the monitor) uh… Sadie, doesn't that mailbox wait familiar?
Sadie: (Gasps) oh my, gosh! That's GWEN'S mailbox!!!
(The monitor shows Duncan walking upwardly to the front door of the house [Mail in hand] …and certain enough, Gwen is standing at that place in her pajamas waiting for him. The clip pauses and everyone gasps)
Chris: (Looks intrigued) ooh, y'all have intrigued my easily bored involvement.
Source: https://www.deviantart.com/jasperpie/art/My-Big-Fat-Total-Drama-All-Stars-Wedding-Part-3-569268460
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